Dead Martian Walking

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Dead Martian Walking
Number 58
Broadcast Date May 14, 2012
Episode Length 1:13:07
Hosts Andrew Mayne, Brian Brushwood, Justin Robert Young

Fight! An epic battle ensues when Brian wonders aloud if everyone would be okay with sending a willing volunteer on a one way trip to Mars. Is it a bold, necessary step toward brining humanity beyond the stars? Or a gruesome galactic human sacrifice with no real value? Meanwhile! A secret is unearthed underneath the Kodak building in Rochester. Can Justin resist the temptation to cook a bag of popcorn on it and eat the tainted, yet delicious, results?

Contents

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Giant Useless Sculptures

Andrew brings up the fact that engineers are building this huge sculpture for the London Olympics. The guys thought that it would be a much better idea to build a huge sculpture of Winston Churchill shooting lasers out of his eyes, with a foot on Hitlers flaming head.

The Great "One-Way Trip to Mars" Debate

Brian mentioned that we as a people should send someone out a one-way trip to Mars and then continue sending supplies to him to keep him alive. Justin and Andrew immediately jumped on Brian for supporting a "death sentence". Elon musk could very well just send himself to Mars in a few decades and never come back, Justin argues that this is fine because he would be going there "as a colonizer". This seems to be the same thing that Brian was saying with the only exception being that it is just some guy going to Mars.

Brian believes that we would be sending people that want to go and be the first people to live on Mars. Meanwhile, Justin and Andrew imagine that "this dude" would just suffer a slow lonely death on his Mars-based live stream. Justin and Andrew could not get the idea of a guy slowly dying by himself out of their head and they only wanted to have a silly conversation. Obviously this did not mesh with Brian who wanted to have a serious discussion about a one-way trip to Mars.

Plotting Chimpanzees

There is a patient at a research hospital that has a very interesting condition. He doesn't have very good communication skills and he seems to be plotting. Apparently, this patient has a severe case of being a Chimpanzee. This chimp likes to terrorize the people visiting him at the zoo he is at, and he continues to adapt after the caretakers take away his weapons. He would wait until nobody was looking and then grab a bunch of rocks, hide them under a pile of hay and then throw them at tourists when the time was right.

Radioactive Popcorn

Recently, some very unsettling information came to light regarding Kodak's underground R&D department in Rochester, New York. Apparently for 30 years, they had three and a half pounds of enriched weapons-grade Uranium in a nuclear reactor in their basement. It was done with permission from the government, however the company never made a public statement. It is unclear whether or not Lucius Fox is involved in this.

In the great Weird Things tradition, the guys decided to act out the situation using made up characters and came up with a story where they threaten people with a dirty bomb and cook popcorn with their nuclear weapons.

SERIOUS Mars Discussion

After the podcast ended, Brian, Justin and Andrew had a more serious discussion about sending people on a one-way trip to Mars. Watch the video!

Book Club

Brian

Justin

Andrew

Fun Facts

  • With all the talk of unleashing dirty bombs on the world, Brian, Justin and Andrew are surely on all sorts of government watch lists, but Andrew has connections; it's probably fine.

Great Quotes

  • "I think he's just an averagely intelligent chimp, who's super bored, and kind of an asshole." - Beef (from the chatroom)

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Preceded by:
"Meat Blobs Keep Falling On My Head"
Dead Martian Walking
Followed by:
"Night of the Dragon"