Qulte Woke

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Qulte Woke
Number 218
Broadcast Date April 25, 2018
Episode Length 01:18:08
Hosts Brian Brushwood, Justin Robert Young

It turns out we were the Nostradamuseses of bullshit! Five years ago we foretold the joining of Alex Jones and Kanye West, so we've revived "Alex or Kanye?" Plus, a lewd encounter at HEB and nicklefiddlin'. Look at this nicklegraph!

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Hey What's Going On?

Nobody cares what's going on, Kanye and Alex Jones are in the news and there are jokes to be made. Bonnie's take? "Kanye is suing Alex Jones for fake news." Night Attack (as NSFW Show #185, July 2013) did it first! In fact, let's watch the entire bit on the show. Wow the show was... not tight back in 2013.

Patreon and Twitch Moment

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Meet the new game, same as the old game!

Sure they did this game before, but it's topical now, and make hay while the sun shines, that's what I aways say. They play WHO SAID IT: KANYE WEST OR ALEX JONES? Not restricted to twitter, any source.

  • “Watch these control freak vampires go crazy” Brian: Alex, Justin: Kanye. It was ALEX JONES
  • ”It is possible the Kardassian family is actually quite woke?" Brian: Alex, Justin: Alex. It was ALEX JONES
  • ”I’m doing pretty good as far as geniuses go. I’m like a machine, I’m a robot. You cannot offend a robot" Brian: Kanye, Justin: Kanye. It was KANYE WEST
  • ”I have a right to talk about whatever I want. I have a right to give an opinion” Brian:Kanye, Justin: Kanye. It was KANYE WEST
  • ”I like humanity and cool people" Brian: Alex, Justin: Kanye. It was ALEX JONES
  • ”A new goddess has arrived and I think it’s fantastic" Brian: Kanye, Justin: Kanye. It was ALEX JONES
  • ”Well you know what, I’ve seen your hernia" Brian: Alex, Justin: Kanye. It was ALEX JONES
  • ”I care, I care about everything. Sometimes not giving a fuck is caring the most" Brian: Kanye, Justin: Kanye. It was KANYE WEST
  • ”Fuck SNL and the whole cast" Brian: Kanye, Justin: Alex. It was KANYE WEST (it’s a lyric from POWER)
  • ”I don’t even listen to rap, my apartment is too nice to listen to rap in" Brian: Kanye, Justin: Kanye. It was KANYE WEST
  • ”If you have an apple, and I have an apple, and we exchange these apples, then you and I will still each have one apple" Brian: Kanye, Justin: Alex. It was KANYE WEST

Brian wins!

Diamond Time

Movie Draft

1st Night Attack, 2nd Cordkillers, 3rd JohnTrekker, 4th Chips Bitch. Want to actually know? Go to the real stuff at http://draft.diamondclub.tv

Fun Facts

  • The episode title "Qulte Woke" comes from some poor typography on a web article about Kanye West and brian interpreting "Quite" as "Qulte"
  • Special in-studio guest was Brad LeClerc
  • The aftershow featured the birth of Justin's new character, "Kid Millennial"


Preshow & Aftershow

Since Night Attack is directly funded by the viewers, the preshow and aftershow videos are available to Patrons of the show ASAP and freely available 48h after release. If you're not yet a Patron of the show, then go to Patreon.com/NightAttack and pledge ANY amount!

Preceded by:
"The Real Warehouse Was The Friends We Made Along The Way"
Qulte Woke
Followed by:
""""Crystal""" Pepsi"