Double O Heaven

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Double O Heaven
Number 89
Broadcast Date February 13, 2013
Episode Length 1:16:01
Hosts Andrew Mayne, Justin Robert Young

Justin and Andrew are riding as a power duo in this episode of the Weird Things podcast. Who is going to be the next Pope? We thumb through many surprising possibilities including a few super spies who would take the head Vatican role on His Majesty In Heaven’s Secret Service. A space death missile will narrowly miss us, but what would happen if it didn’t? And why shouldn’t we be shooting at it?


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New Pope

A day or two before the recording, it was announced that Pope Benedict XVI would be the first Pope in nearly 600 years to step down from the position. Andrew gave his theory that Pope Benedict XVI was a sort of a placeholder, while they find someone younger and more charismatic. Andrew appoints himself as an advisor to those who will choose the next Pope and recommends that they choose someone who has spent a lot of time in the third world, and is capable of going on television and having an interesting conversation in multiple languages.

As for their guesses at who exactly will be the next Pope, Andrew brought up the point that ANY Catholic man can be Pope. Brian and Justin once came up with the idea for a movie titled "Asshole Pope" in which an "any man", played by Andrew Dice Clay, was chosen for the Papacy. Some famous Catholic men that are technically in the running are: Liam Neeson, Mel Gibson, Mark Wahlberg, and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Out of these candidates, the guys decided that Liam Neeson would probably make the best Pope.

However, Andrew mentions that Sean Connery is Catholic. This spurs a discussion about which "James Bond" actor would make the best Pope. Sean Connery is obviously the best choice since he is both Catholic AND he was in a movie called "The Offence" in which he plays a detective that "snaps while interrogating a suspected child molester."

The Earth Gets a Close Shave

A few days after the recording an asteroid (2012 D14) came within 17,000 miles of Earth, which is within the orbits of some of our satellites. The rock is about 150 feet across and although there is no chance of it hitting Earth in the near future, if it were to impact, it would do about as much damage as the Tunguska event. Justin suggested that we should try to shoot stuff at it to get some practice in before a really dangerous asteroid heads our way. Andrew mentions that once asteroids are this close, there's pretty much nothing we could do to stop it. There are ideas like mass drivers or painting one side of an asteroid that would attempt to push it away, but for those to be effective, we would have to do it years before it even gets close to Earth.

Conspiracy Theories

The asteroid discussion led into Justin and Andrew talking about the moon hoax and the more recent Sandy Hook conspiracy videos. The guys talk a little bit about the validity of some of their claims, however the discussion was mainly about what kinds of people create and believe conspiracy theories.

Relevant xkcd

NASA Arsenic Announcement - Two Years Later

More than two years ago, NASA made an announcement about how they supposedly found life that incorporated arsenic in its DNA. The guys discussed it on the podcast shortly after the announcement was made. Since then, their claims have been pretty thoroughly debunked, yet they still have their original paper up on their website and have not submitted any form of addendum.




Great Quotes

Fun Facts


This episode was recorded offline, with no video recording.


Preceded by:
Double O Heaven
Followed by:
"Smoking Crater"