Ch-ILD

Ch-ILD
Ch-ILD, engaged in conflict during the Russet Rebellions.

Ch-ILD is a species of malevolent extra terrestrial, sentient beings. While "Ch-ILD" refers to its kind in the collective, it is also a signifier of the individual. This is subject to change if diplomatic common ground can be found, and more is known of its peoples. The moniker "Ch-ILD" is not its native given name, but a code name of military origin, standing for "Changeling I'd Like to Destroy."

It is believed that left unchecked, the Ch-ILD would enslave humanity and harvest the organs of those slaughtered. The reasoning behind this is not well defined, or even particularly substantiated, but its intent is speculated to be of a meta-dimensional nature. It is held in the warehouse under lock and key, Brian and Jason are responsible for its containment, and as such subject it to numerous dangerous experiments. The Ch-ILD is typically inanimate, although it does communicate through a pulse of indecipherable psyonic tones.

Timeline

First Sightings

• MR092: Making PVC Blowguns (2017-11-20)

The Ch-ILD is first revealed. It is demonstrated to be a murderous alien changeling in the form of a small inanimate child. It may have led to Jason's lapse in judgement during that episode, with its psyonic abilities. This is speculative and unproven, but possible. It was able to repel all munitions, except for one dart that pierced its chest. It remains standing.

The Russet Rebellions

• MR105: Improvising a Tank (2018-02-20)

The Ch-ILD takes a stand against humanity. Brian and Jason led the Resistance with their newly-developed potato tank technology in holding off Ch-ILD's ravaging affront. They outmaneuvered Ch-ILD by implemented a continually moving attack formation, but were unsuccessful in many of their firing attempts. With this battle, we have caught the first instance of Ch-ILD's psyonic influence caught on camera, appearing as echoed projections of its own form emanating from its body in the direction of attack. Eventually, Brian and Jason land a few critical shots on Ch-ILD. These shots left the Ch-ILD presumed dead, with a cracked fiberglass body, and returned to the warehouse for further detainment.

• MR114: Making a DIY Ballistics Gel Human Head (2018-04-20)

Brian sees it necessary to saw into Ch-ILD's neck with a handsaw, while Jason punches the head off. Ch-ILD remains silent, until forming its head in the image of Jason's head as made of ballistics gel. It exhibits much more character and liveliness to remind Brian, Jason, and Bill of their futile efforts to disable it. The guys subject Ch-ILD to a range of improvised weapons from past episodes. Many of the attacks are glancing blows, but one metal shuriken pierces the gel skin and one nail dart is embedded deep behind the ear.

• MR115: Potato Cannon vs. Human Head (2018-04-27)

Ch-ILD regains its fiberglass head by means unknown, and stalks Brian, Jason, and Bill over the course of the episode. Once the potato cannon reached its optimal state, Ch-ILD was subjected to the fullest extent of its force. Ch-ILD's head was fractured, before being blown clear off. Upon its beheading, Ch-ILD reformed the ballistic gelatin head from the previous episode. The new head is heavily damaged by a potato round hitting the left eye socket, obliterating the eye and fracturing the skull. Again, Ch-ILD was not destroyed, but the harm done was in itself considered a victory for the Resistance.

• Guest Interview: Bill Doran (2018-04-29)

At the end of the interview, Ch-ILD's ballistic gelatin head (removed from its body) is melted with a torch until all that's left is shards of skull. This was done to prevent Ch-ILD from further impersonating Jason.

Experimental Anti-Capture Technologies

• MR136: Razor Blade Flail (2018-08-24)

Returning from a haitus, last seen formally in what is now being referred to as the Russet Rebellions, Ch-ILD appears in the form of a child mannequin zombie. Brian and Jason have detained it for testing their new bleeding edge weapons technology: the razor blade flail. Due to Ch-ILD's refusal to dawn a skin-like texture for proper testing, Jason calls upon his paternal legacy of meat pinning to cover it with a skin facsimile of expired sliced turkey meat. The test parameters are under the assumption of being captured in an otherworldly detention center, and results show promise but at a great risk of causing harm to not only the subject, but also the wielder of the tech.